The universe of etiquette: the cultural code and modern inheritance of traditional Chinese wedding customs
From the words recorded in the "Book of Rites", "Those who fail to perform rituals will marry the best of the two surnames, and serve the ancestral temple, and the descendants will inherit the descendants." It can be seen that traditional wedding customs are deeply rooted in the profound thinking of the Chinese ancestors on the order of the universe, the continuation of the family, and the philosophy of life. Only by looking through the complicated ritual appearances can we touch the cultural context of the Chinese nation that has lasted for thousands of years.
Among the Chinese wedding customs, the etiquette system with a very orthodox style has its origins very far. Its core structure was laid on the basis of the Zhou Dynasty, which is the "six etiquette" system. This "six etiquette" system is to accept the ceremony, to ask for the name, to accept the invitation, and to accept the invitation, then to ask for a date, and finally to welcome in person. Wild geese were chosen when recruiting because of their characteristics of "going north and south at any time without losing their integrity", which symbolized that women would accompany each other according to etiquette when they got married; asking the woman's name and performing divination reflected the reverence for the gods of heaven and earth and a prudent attitude towards the future; the process of recruiting was not based on calculations about wealth, but on the contrary, it was a token of good relations and a promise made by the two families to form a good relationship between the Qin and Jin Dynasties. This complete ritual system is the crystallization of the wisdom of the Chinese people who sanctify marriage and the institutionalization of marriage. It embodies the way of neutralization that "starts with love and stops with etiquette."
In the vast land of China, wedding customs in various places present a diverse and integrated cultural landscape. The Achang people, who are located in the southwest border, have a "testing ceremony" of using 3-meter-long Hsinchu to pick vegetables. This means that the groom must have the tenacity to overcome difficulties. There are "grabbing the door" and "original wedding wine" in Anhui, which take the "lucky" lottery and sisters. In order to express the deep friendship, Shaanxi mothers will tie white onions on the bride's skirt to convey the instigation of "wisdom and innocence". Guangdong has "Liuhehechun" and rice noodles, which secretly conform to the heavenly way of "Liuhehe will be completed in time" and the human wish of "long-lasting perfection". These folk customs seem to be completely different from each other on the surface, but in fact they share the same cultural genes, which are the praise of life, the maintenance of the family, and the prayer for happiness. This is actually a vivid projection of the Chinese cultural context in folk life.
The marriage customs that incorporate traditional traditions contain a unique beauty, and the root of this beauty lies in the humanistic spirit it carries. With the help of ritualized forms, it builds a harmonious relationship between people, a harmonious relationship between people and society, and a harmonious relationship between people and heaven and earth. The "noisy" situation in weddings, as Professor Mao Liping said, is to break through the daily rules of respect for seniority and inferiority, to achieve the full expression of emotions in the carnival atmosphere and to achieve effective integration of the community. Its original intention is to "make fun", with the auspicious expectation of "if it doesn't make a fuss, the more it becomes more noisy". The behaviors in Chaoshan weddings called "face-saving" and "crying for marriage" are a kind of farewell in girlhood, an emotional tribute to parents' nurturing kindness, and a concrete expression of a culture called "filial piety culture." The emotional memory and cultural identity shared by the Chinese people are built through this ceremony. Just as Ms. Zhang Yujing recalled the lively scene of her childhood wedding, the warmth has been integrated into the collective unconscious of the nation and turned into a symbolic expression of nostalgia and roots.
However, as times have changed, some marriage customs have become alienated. Phenomenons such as astronomical betrothal gifts and vulgar wedding troubles have deviated from the original connotation contained in "rituals" and fallen into old routines full of extravagance and vulgarity, causing marriage to become a double burden accompanied by spiritual and material levels. Delving deeply into its essential origin, we find that the traditional ritual and music civilization with unique civilizational characteristics has been lost and distorted under the impact of the wave of modernity. Fortunately, contemporary society is actively exploring and carrying out creative transformation and innovative development of traditional culture. Since the Ministry of Civil Affairs advocated the establishment of simple and moderate marriage customs, young people have become very fond of new etiquette such as travel weddings, group weddings, and online live weddings. What we see is not a break from tradition, but a return to a higher level. Chen Qingqing hopes to celebrate with his family with a simple meal. Mr. Chen from Nanjing chose a "half-traditional, half-travel" compromise, which is a vivid reflection of the younger generation's search for a balance between respecting tradition and pursuing individuality.
Inherit ancient traditions, open a modern chapter, adhere to correct principles, and carry out innovation and change. The evolution path of Chinese marriage customs should be a broad and flat road that not only maintains cultural orthodoxy but also conforms to the trend of the times. What we want to get rid of are the dross and glitz that have lost touch with the times, but what we insist on protecting is the respect and fear for marriage, the importance and cherishment of family, and the love and love for life. As Chaozhou Cai Hongjian said, modern wedding customs increasingly show "care for people", which is exactly the contemporary response to the "people-oriented" thinking of Chinese culture. Only by retaining the traditional warmth in simplified rituals and continuing the blood of the nation in the expression of personality can the ancient cultural form of wedding customs exude the eternal charm of being both solemn, elegant, fresh and simple in the new era, so that every couple can open a new chapter in life in a ceremony full of cultural confidence.
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