If you hold back the words in your heart, they will become a disease.
Just last night, my son asked me out of the blue and said: "Mom, when you were a child, did you ever have the idea that after you die, you don't have to do homework?".
The chopsticks clattered onto the table. He is only eight years old.
Someone set off fireworks outside the window, and there was a loud bang, causing his little face to light up and darken. My mouth opened slightly, but nothing came out. Those words that we thought were far away from our children—depression, anxiety, and self-injury—have quietly crawled to their bedsides, but we were blind and failed to see them.
What counts as mental health?
On Baidu, the content written in those entries gives people a cold feeling. The "self-control ability" and "mental balance" mentioned in them read like stones.
On the contrary, I think that mental health means that children dare to cry in front of you, dare to show anger, dare to admit that they failed in the exam and are afraid to go home. It’s not that at a young age, one knew how to observe words and emotions, swallow the grievances in one’s heart, and force out an “I’m fine” smile.
At their age, they can't hide the things in their hearts.
Crying is a signal, silence is a signal, and even suddenly being extra well-behaved and sensible is also a signal, that is, he is doing his best so that adults will not bother him about it.
How do you find out something is wrong with your child?
Don't just look at your transcript. Look at the eyes.
If the light in a child's eyes dims, he or she loses interest in anything he or she sees, and the fried chicken he once loved the most is placed in front of him and he is too lazy to reach out and grab it. Or maybe he couldn't sleep well, so he got up secretly in the middle of the night and asked him what he was doing. He responded that he couldn't sleep.
Also, if he starts to hate himself.
Those words such as "I'm so stupid", "No one likes me", "Life is boring" are not hypocritical, but a signal for help. When a child turns on the self-denial mode, there is already a downpour in his heart, but we are still scolding him outside for not bringing an umbrella.
What books should I read in first grade?
It has pictures, few words, and can be touched.
It is not the kind of book that you will learn a truth from after reading it, but the kind of book that will make you laugh, scare you, and make you want to ask what happens next.
The best thing is a picture book, where most of the page is pictures and only two or three lines of text are arranged here. He was making up random stories about the picture, and you just listened quietly, occasionally adding a word. When the book is already tattered and almost turned over, the relationship with it becomes closer.
Don't be in a hurry to get him to read. Studying is not work, so why rush to complete the task?
My eyes are nearsighted, what should I do?
Run outside and bask in the sun.
Go outdoors for two hours every day, and when the sun shines on your body, dopamine will emerge and the eye axis will stop growing.
Don’t delay getting glasses. If you can’t see the blackboard clearly but don’t wear glasses and just squint your eyes, the degree will increase more quickly. Doctors say that eating carrots and purple potatoes is effective, but don’t expect that eating a few carrots will restore myopia to its original state.
Can myopia be cured?
The truth doesn't sound good.
True myopia cannot be cured when a child's eyeballs are still growing. Those claims that true myopia can be cured are actually aimed at your wallet. However, children are young and their eyes are still growing and developing, so they can be controlled. Reduce the time you spend looking at your phone, get enough sleep, and eat less sweets. These are more effective than any so-called folk remedies.
Don't let glasses become a burden on your child. Tell him that glasses are like "crutches" for his eyes. He can rely on them when he is tired. There is nothing to be ashamed of.
What should I do if my child wants to lose weight?
You're only 12 years old, don't fast or take medicine.
If you're fatter or thinner, you'll both grow, so what's the rush? What I'm afraid of is that in order to lose weight, I'll starve myself and get sick.
Move regularly, reduce sedentary time, fall asleep before nine o'clock in the evening and get enough sleep, your height will grow well, and fat will disappear on its own. You should reduce the use of oil in the kitchen, and reserve more fruits of all kinds. Take your child to climb mountains on the weekends and keep them in a sweaty state. Take a shower after coming back, and eat half a bowl more at meals.
How to choose a nanny
Look at the way she squats down to talk to the child.
Instead of giving instructions from a standing posture, instead of treating the child as a task to be completed, he squatted down, looked at each other with his eyes, and spoke slowly.
You need to look at the certificate, but more importantly, you need to look at the actual practice. Whether her hands are gentle when changing diapers, whether she is patient when feeding, and whether her first reaction when a child cries is to comfort her or to get annoyed. Situations like this cannot be written on the certificate.
In addition, believe or not believe what your child says. If the child says "Auntie is mean", don't rush to scold the child for talking nonsense. Listen first to find out what happened.
last sentence
When it comes to mental health, it boils down to just four words: don't rush, don't curse.
Give him time, give him face, and give him a home he can return to at any time.
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