During the summer vacation every year, many parents will encounter the same troublesome problem, that is, the schedule they set for their children before the vacation has been implemented for less than a week, and it is as if it had not been set at all.
Teacher Mei, who teaches first grade, discovered during a home visit during the holidays that this phenomenon occurs repeatedly in many families, and the problems behind it are much more complicated than "children are disobedient."
An anticlimactic schedule
Teacher Mei first came to Qianqian’s house.
At the beginning of the vacation, Qianqian’s mother took out a timetable, which was clearly written on it. She had to do summer homework and read extracurricular books in the morning, go to swimming training class in the afternoon, practice piano and learn calligraphy when she came back, and watch TV for no more than two hours in the evening.
Looking at this table, it seems scientific and reasonable. However, Qianqian’s mother said with a wry smile that it only lasted less than ten days before everything went wrong. Why? Children always find various reasons to watch TV for a while, and they also procrastinate when doing homework.
Teacher Mei, after watching it carefully, gave this suggestion: How about making some adjustments and adding the cartoons and children's programs that Qianqian really likes to watch directly into the schedule, as long as the overall duration is controlled within two hours.
In addition, Qianqian is usually not too keen on playing with the neighborhood children. It is best to set aside a relatively fixed period of time for outdoor activities every day so that she can have the opportunity to run and jump with her friends.
Qianqian's parents nodded repeatedly and said they would immediately modify it according to this idea.
Let children participate in the formulation to be motivated
In another family, Teacher Mei saw a completely different scene.
Chenchen, who was rushing to speak, said, "My work and rest schedule is determined together with my parents!" Every weekend, his father would bring the "Radio and Television News" and let Chenchen draw out the TV programs and cartoons he planned to watch next week, and prioritize these time reservations.
In the remaining free time, we will arrange summer homework, hobbies and outdoor activities.
Chenchen’s father explained that the programs that his child is passionate about have very fixed broadcast times. If he is forced to do homework at that specific time period, then his mind will always be thinking about the TV. In turn, he will not be able to calm down and do his homework.
Otherwise, give him your time generously, so that he can complete his homework with peace of mind, and also watch cartoons happily.
Chenchen’s mother also added that because the programs change every week, the schedule at home needs to be adjusted again according to the program list every week.
What's more critical is that parents do not impose their opinions on their children, but encourage them to participate in the discussion process.
For example, Chenchen once proposed that when there are more good programs, the overall time spent watching TV this week can be slightly increased; and when the number of good programs is small, it will be automatically reduced.
As long as the overall average does not exceed two hours a day, the family will satisfy him.
In this way, Chenchen is particularly motivated to execute, and does not need repeated urging from adults.
Self-control requires supervision and rewards
Chenchen's father frankly said that it is simply unrealistic to allow children aged six or seven to abide by their schedules entirely on their own initiative.
The method adopted at home is " Supervision and rewards ".
Those things that can be queried with results, such as the designated page numbers for summer homework and the chapters for calligraphy exercises, are arranged during the time when the adults are at work and not at home.
Come back in the evening after get off work to check each item. If it does not meet the requirements, you must do it again, and the time you spend watching TV next week must be reduced accordingly.
Some activities that require the company of adults, such as piano practice and outdoor sports, are arranged directly after dinner and completed under the supervision of parents.
Teacher Mei asked with a curious expression: "If the children obey very well, is there any way to reward them?" Chenchen immediately ran into the back room quickly and took out a piece of paper. The "Reward Menu" was clearly written on the paper: The first prize is on weekends. On Sundays, I take Chenchen to the museum, the zoo, or the amusement park; the second prize is to go swimming with my parents, or play video games; the third prize is to buy Chenchen’s favorite books, or model airplanes, or model airplanes.
Chenchen’s father smiled and said that this menu was also made according to Chenchen’s requirements.
Chenchen added proudly and said, "I once won the second prize! We are going to go swimming in the swimming pool with lighting facilities. And I also won the third prize once, and the prize was the big ship model!"
How to make a schedule suitable for first grade children
Based on Teacher Mei’s accumulated experience in home visiting, a summer schedule that is actually suitable for first-year students should cover at least three key points.
First, let the children participate in the entire process.
The adults in the family can prepare a list of TV programs for the week in advance, and work with the child to circle the programs he really wants to watch, and prioritize these time slots.
Second, establish a flexible adjustment mechanism.
TV programs change every week, and accordingly, the schedule needs to be dynamically modified based on this, rather than always using the same schedule to the end.
Third, implementable supervision and reward measures should be provided.
Arrange the tasks that can be used to check the results when the parents are not at home, and check them one by one in the evening; at the same time, prepare a list of rewards that the child really likes, so that he will know the benefits of following the rules.
When it comes to those beautiful pictures of time schedules for first-grade children on the Internet, you can refer to their layout and color matching. However, the core content must be customized according to your child's interests and weekly program list. If you copy someone else's template, it is usually difficult to stick to it.
If you think about it carefully, the summer schedule is not a tool used to restrain children, but a structure to help them build a solid sense of time.
Let the children draw circles on their own, let the children make their own choices, and let the children bear the consequences. This approach is much more effective than parents giving unilateral orders.
Even if the implementation is not perfect at first, as long as the general direction is correct and adjustments are made step by step, after a holiday, you will notice real progress in your child's self-control and time management.
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